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We’re at the halfway point of the original #100loveletters challenge.

I am going to collect the email list posts, blog posts, and interviews into a resource package that would be available for free download on my website. The package would be designed to offer encouragement and support to anyone who wanted to start the challenge on their own (or with their community). It will also be a resource that we can use when I run the challenge again.

If you would like to participate – by including your favourite love letter, doing an interview with me, or letting me know how this experience has been for you – send me a message and we’ll get that ball rolling.

My goal will be to put the package together over the next 50-ish days, and have it available for download once the original challenge ends.

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#100loveletters

Words are challenging lately, and being mindful and present is challenging, and art pushes me into mindfulness and presence without asking me to words.

I am glad that I can accept the door that’s open even when it’s not the door I’m comfortable with.

I am glad that I can let myself do mediocre art as an act of self-love.

Also, I am glad that metaphors exist, and thankful that ‘subtle’ has never been something I aspire to be.

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I forgot to draw the name for the second hand-written card for the #100loveletters challenge last week, and I’m also a day behind in sending out this week’s email.

What that means is that I’m going to be sending a postcard to everyone who has signed up for the draw, from Montreal. (Why does it mean that? I don’t know. Why does anything mean anything? Scream into the void with me, friends.)

So if you’ve already entered the draw, send me your address.

And if you haven’t entered the draw, and you would like to, send me your entry (which can EITHER be a love letter, a discussion of your love letter process, OR just lettin’ me know you want in).

The draw is only for folks participating in the 100 love letters challenge, but “participating” is entirely at your discretion. You can be participating online in the hashtag, you can be participating every day, you can be participating offline in total privacy, you can be participating once a month. I trust you.

BUT! If you want to get in on the spontaneous “You get a postcard! And you get a postcard! And you get a postcard! EVERYONE GETS A POSTCARD!” deal, you have to let me know before I send out the email tomorrow.

http://tiffanysostar.us16.list-manage.com/subscribe?u=3c400335fd57acf5716460825&id=8757c06a2a

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Dear Tiffany,

Compulsively scrolling facebook to avoid The Feels is giving you a headache and making your wrists hurt and not helping very much.

I love you.

You will be okay.

You are doing a good job.

Breathe, smol inner self.

Love,
Me

#100loveletters

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Dear Tiffany,

You have good people. The best people.

For a lot of years, as this constellation of people was twinkling into existence, you were afraid that you were tricking them into liking you, they were delusional, you were going to be revealed to be a horrible unloveable monster.

Those fears were not based in reality.

Your people love you.

You haven’t tricked them into it.

They aren’t fools who have been fooled.

And they are such good people.

They are the best people.

We are magic, we are stars, pulling the constellation together with the gravity of our big hearts.

Welcome to the Non-Binary Nebula. There’s space for so many.

Love,
Me

#100loveletters

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Dear Tiffany,

In another universe, you are still friends with your ex-husband. Your kids have playdates. You have found the good in each other, built something together, something real and good and not a marriage.

In another other universe, you are still friends with Tara from elementary and junior high, and your friendship survived the riptide of depression and teen angst.

In another other universe, you are still friends with Ashley, and you were wise enough at 7 (or whatever age it was) to stay in touch when you moved across the city.

Other universes, other selves, other relationships.

Family relationships. Friendships. Romances.

All these other universes.

And you think, in those other universes, you are a better person, to have kept those relationships, to have fixed those relationships, to have been good enough/kind enough/smart enough/loving enough/forgiving enough/fun enough/mentally stable enough/energetic enough/whatever enough.

How can you compete with alternate universe Tiffany?

That self has friendships from childhood!

That self has healed all of their relationships.

This self is just… well. I mean.

Not that.

Anyway. It’s hard to stay present right now.

I love you for trying.

I love your imagination, and how you imagine connection.

I love you for coming back to this universe no matter how difficult that is.

High fives, you.

High fives, me.

You are still a pretty okay person, even in this universe. Even with all the broken relationships in your history. Even with all the disconnections and the pain and the struggle. Even with all of that.

(And also, you never know what those Tiffanys in alternate universes long for. Maybe they have all of their relationships but they don’t have such badass coping skills? Maybe they wish they could tell terrible pun jokes? You just don’t know.)

Love,
Me

#100loveletters

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#100loveletters

Dear Tiffany,

There is sadness in you, and part of the work is reaching back to love and calm and heal that sad younger self. But another part of the work is reaching back to your joyful inner child, to let that young self love and calm and heal you. To let the healing flow forwards *and* backwards. To find treasure at both ends of the rainbow. To find comfort in connection. To recognize how it flows, both the sadness and the joy.

Love,

Me

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#100loveletters

Long day, so long, and so sad, and so full of capital-f Feelings.

Is it good that you still got so much work done?

I don’t know, but you did.

Some days launch your focus far into otherspace, and it’s hard to feel love towards yourself in those moments.

That’s okay.

It is okay to focus elsewhere.

It is important, even, sometimes.

Balance.

Now, sleep. Tomorrow will bring its own share of shadow and shimmer.

Love,

Me